Parenting Through the Gospel

"Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in 

love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual 

needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe

 the commandments of God, and to be law-abiding 

citizens wherever they live."

-The Family: A Proclamation to the World

Parents are the best examples children have. Children look up to their parents in every way, making it that much more important for the parents to always be their best. It does put a lot of pressure on parents because kids are very influential be it through language or actions. The easiest way to ensure that your children are being raised the best way and being taught the things that are important in life is to have a gospel and Christ centered home and follow the teachings of the Church.

"Parents are to devote their best efforts to the teaching 

and rearing of their children in gospel principles which will keep them 

close to the Church. The home is the basis of a righteous life, 

and no other instrumentality can take its place or fulfill its essential functions 

in carrying forward this God-given responsibility"

Parents are responsible for teaching and raising their children in the gospel, but if a children decides for themselves to veer away from the gospel and its teachings, that action is on that child. Parents can and should do everything in their power to keep the children on the straight and narrow path so that they can all be together eternally. We all know that is not how this life works all the time. All parents can do is their best and what they know is right and the rest is left to the agency of the child. 

The impact the parents have on a child's life is impossible to overlook. Many studies have shown that there is scientific evidence that children with both parents present and active in the child's life have more success in school, have better self esteem, and are more equipped with the skills and characteristics needed in the real world. 

"Parents must realize that they have the 

opportunity to proactively help their children develop positive 

traits or overcome undesirable tendencies. Children will be 

most open to instruction when they feel loved and accepted by their parents. 

They will act to maintain positive interactions."

As we talk about parenting, we must remember that there are different parenting styles done by all. Not everyone believes that children should be disciplined and taught in the same way. There are two distinct types of parenting styles but both can be broken up into many smaller groups all of which are slightly different. I will explain each one for you so you can know what they each entail and you can decide for yourself which one you want to be or which one you already are. 

Authoritative parenting- Parents who create a positive atmosphere based on high expectations and high amounts of love. Children tend to be the most responsive to these types of parents. Disciplinary actions are taken when necessary. 

"In essence, authoritative parenting

 creates an interactional climate that not only promotes 

positive parent–child relationships 

but also invites the Spirit of the Lord."

Permissive parenting- Parents who are uninvolved and disengaged in a child's life. They do not actively teach their children or discipline them when necessary and do not provide behavior control. 

Although these two parenting styles seem to be completely opposite of each other, it is easy to see characteristics of each of these parenting styles in everyone. The church urges that we strive towards more authoritative parenting and lead our children with love and positive discipline. Parenting is hard and there is no guide book on the do's and don'ts but this gospel provides a way for us to be the best parents we can be and then the Savior will fill in the gaps. 

"As children grow through the years, their lives, 

in large measure, become an extension and a reflection of 

family teaching. If there is harshness, abuse, uncontrolled 

anger, disloyalty, the fruits will be certain and discernable, 

and in all likelihood they will be repeated in the 

generation that follows. If, on the other hand, there is forbearance, 

forgiveness, respect, consideration, kindness, mercy, and 

compassion, the fruits again will be discernible, and they will be eternally rewarding. 

They will be positive and sweet and wonderful. I speak to 

fathers and mothers everywhere with a plea to put harshness 

behind us, to bridle our anger, to lower our voices, 

and to deal with mercy and love and respect one toward another in our homes."

- President Gordon B. Hinkley

All of this information is found in Successful Marriages and Families Chapter 11- Parenting in Gospel Context: Practices Do Make a Difference written by David A. Nelson.